Turn nerves into laughter
A game does something clever: it gives two people a script. Instead of working out who moves first, the cards or the dice decide, and the laughing starts. It suits a second or third meeting better than a first, once you know each other's sense of humour and what makes the other person comfortable.
The games post has three to try: a card game in the style of tarot fortunes, where each card stands for something you then act out; strip versions of ordinary games, from snap to chess; and dice that tell you what to do and where. All three need almost no kit and a sense of humour. The post is cheerfully frank, so read it before you suggest it.
Strip games need less kit than you'd think: a pack of cards and a coin cover most of them. Quick rounds, like snap or calling a coin toss, move things along, while a long board game makes it a slow burn. Pick the pace that suits the mood, and watch the room: if the other person laughs, lean in, and if they go quiet, switch to something else. A game that has stopped being fun has done its job, and it's fine to drop it.
Agree the rules before the first roll
Talk limits first, away from the bedroom: what's off the table, who can say pass and what a pass means. Anyone can call time at any point, with no explanation, and the game simply stops. Keep the stakes small at the start. The game is a way into the evening, not a target to complete, so stop while it's still fun. Afterwards, ask what each of you enjoyed and what you'd swap out. A game you both want to play again beats a clever one you won't repeat.
Choose your moment as well. A text saying "I've got a game for Friday" gives the other person time to say yes, no or not yet. If you want help building up to it, the top three sex tips post suggests booking time for each other and keeping some affection going in public so the tension builds.
Play with someone you've already met in a public place, not on a first visit to a stranger's flat. For more ideas, see exploring sex and communication, and the first hookup tips cover agreeing what you both want.
Keep it playful
Every post is in the blog archive, newest first.